Thanks to the accelerated energies of 2015, and matter lining up to literally manifest long held dreams, I’ve been quite absent here on my site. Quick updates on Fb and Twitter is as good as I’ve mustered over the past few months. With a new babe at Winter Solstice, selling our home and almost everything we own in TN and moving our family 2,400 miles away to Seattle, WA, I’ve had little time to blog.
I’m enjoying our new adventure, smelling the flowers of life, and if I’m honest, truly enjoying a disconnect from anything, well, dis-connecting me from the moment I’m living. So many signs and human angels are guiding me to keep singing. I feel a blossoming happening for us here in the breathtaking Northwest. A.muse.in’ Harmony site sprucing is coming, so stay tuned.
Here’s hoping your 2015 vortex is crankin’ dream come true manifestations, too!
PLEASE BE ADVISED… This is the whole, raw, complete, beautiful, sacred truth of our birth story. No details spared!
It was 1am, Monday, December 22, 2014, on the Black New Moon of Winter Solstice. I awoke with a cramping sensation. I might be in labor, I thought, so I took note of the time and fell back to sleep. About 8 minutes later, I awoke again with the same cramping sensation. Not wanting to wake my husband, Jon, until I knew for sure, and knowing that he would need his rest to support me, I continued to rest in between rushes, keeping track of their distance apart.
Around 3am, the rushes were about 4-6 minutes apart and getting stronger, and I was having to breathe more deeply through them. Needing no further convincing, I awoke Jon, letting him know that I was in labor. I explained that I should eat something to build my strength, so he went to the kitchen to bring me some soup. While he was away, I suddenly had a craving for one of my son’s organic, whole food bear vitamins, so I called for him to bring two of them, too.
This was my second birth, and I was amazed at the deep, calm wisdom within that I felt guiding me. I welcomed the experience, knowing that every rush would bring my baby to me. I trusted my body and felt fully capable of bringing our child into the world. With my amazing, supportive, deeply loving husband by my side, I could do anything.
After gaining nourishment, I went to the bathroom while Jon prepared our bed. As I passed by the mirror, I realized I was wearing the shirt my Mom gave me just a few days prior. On the front was a huge open lotus flower. How perfect! I sat on the toilet to pee and saw that my mucus plug was making its way out. I began singing that just like a lotus flower, I, too, would ooooOpen wiiiiiide.
I walked around a bit, and by 4am, my rushes were a couple minutes apart and around 40 seconds long. I texted my midwife, Jennifer Vines, to let her know that I was in labor and inform her on the status of my rushes. She asked if I would like to have doula support or contact her as things progressed. I chose the latter. At this point, I was feeling very tired, so I asked Jon to lie down with me to see if I could rest between rushes. We spooned and he rubbed my back. I could feel him sharing loving, peaceful energy with me. So soothing… Amazingly, as if my body heard my call, my rushes spread back to 6 minutes apart for a little while, so I was able to sleep between them.
Two hours later, at 6am, my rushes got closer and intensified. I sat up recharged and ready to give birth to our baby. We called my Mom to get her up to speed, telling her she could contact my Blessing Way circle of Sisters around 7am to light their candles and send good energies…and that she should arrive around 8 to be there when our 5 year old son, Abner, was waking so she could help dress him and take him to her house just down the street. She expressed that she kept feeling that the baby would come around 11am. I then had Jon call the midwife to give her an update on my progress. She said she would begin gathering her things and her team (her daughter, Carissa, and Sandee) and head our way in a bit.
The toilet, being a place of opening and releasing, felt like a good place for me, so I decided to hang out there. All the while, Jon was right by my side supporting me, rubbing my back, thanking me and telling me how beautiful I was and how wonderful I was doing. With each rush, I would tone low, primal sounds while visualizing myself opening up like a lotus. The sounds washed through me, helping me open and relieving my discomfort. In hindsight, I imagine these sound vibrations also comforted our baby from within.
My bum began to get tired of the toilet seat, so I asked Jon to prepare a bath. He helped me up from the toilet, and we danced as he assisted me into the tub. Ahhhhhh, how wonderful the water felt. I called upon its wisdom, the support of my ancestors who gave birth before me, Source and my highest guides. The sun was rising, casting the most beautiful golden hue on the woods outside my bathtub’s picture window. I felt so much love from the sacred cedars and all the nature spirits, expressing my gratitude for them. I visualized my central channel cleared and charged with pure Source energy. I could feel it pouring in through my crown and emanating throughout my being.
Still in the bath, at 8am, my Mom arrived just as our son was waking. The midwife and her team arrived at 8:30 and finished prepping our bedroom. Sandee was diligently providing doula support and giving me water to drink between each rush. My Mom and Abner came to tell us goodbye, and they left for her house.
Feeling my rushes beginning to become stagnant, my intuition guided me to get out of the bath and back on the loo. Once there, my midwife, Jennifer knotted up a sarong to create a little tug of war for Jon and I. I began pulling on it during rushes, and after a couple went by, I suddenly heard and felt a POP, followed by waters rushing out. I then vomited, but only once. After that, my rushes reached a whole new level of intensity, like crashing waves on a stormy day, coming strong and fast. I knew then I was in transition.
Uncomfortable with the hard toilet seat at this phase, Jon assisted me to a seated position on the Gaiam ball that my intuition guided me to borrow from my Mom weeks prior. My chest was supported with pillows on our bed in front of me. It was then that I felt the urge to begin pushing, and with each rush I would circle my hips atop the ball, noticing that certain positions would bring forth more waters. I was a mammal, a powerful tigress, sounding deep and guttural. My team assured me that I was very close and doing great. Though I wanted to believe them, a part of me felt they were just saying that to make me feel better, since I pushed 3 hours with my first. I realized that doubt wasn’t helping, so I shifted back to trusting and knowing it was true, that our baby would soon be born.
In no time it seemed, I began feeling down pressure sitting on the ball, and decided to get up. My team guided me on all fours, placed the ball in front of me and draped a towel over it for me to grip. As my legs were tired, I sat back on my feet in a modified squat position and kept pushing with the rushes. Oooooooooooommmm…Ooooooooooommmmm… more sounding, more opening.
All the sudden I found myself concerned over not having paid my midwife in full, yet. I knew from reading the birthing stories in Ina May’s midwifery books that once women voiced their toils, the baby came right out. She sensed my thinking, and asked me about it, just as I was beginning to share that there was something I needed to express. Once I did, and she very kindly assured me that she was not worried about it, that it was okay, and that right now, I just needed to have this baby, I got back to the task at hand.
Just as the stories told, within 5 minutes, I felt a strong burning sensation. It was like I was giving birth through my bum hole. (People don’t talk about this much, but it’s true!) Jennifer checked me, and she said she felt the baby’s head. After a couple more pushes, she directed me to raise my bum up off my feet a bit and shared, “We’ve got the head!” On one hand I was so excited to hear his head was out, but on the other hand I was like, “Then what is the hang up?!”, because with my first, once the head was out, the rest of him just slid on out. I felt a gentle tug and immediate relief…our baby was born at 11:34am!!! Since I was facing the other direction, I turned my head and saw our precious BOY!!! Surprise, it’s a boy!!! I watched as they cleared his airways and he turned pink. The song of his cries was music to my ears.
Jon helped me to the bed, and they placed our precious baby in my arms. Infinite loooove! We went right to work on getting latched and breastfeeding. It took him a little while, but he tried diligently and got the hang of it, finally latching and drinking in my sacred, natural nourishment. The placenta was born and Jon cut the cord once it was done pumping. Abner and Mom arrived at the house to check on us, only to find that the baby had been born. They came in and greeted our new family member, Arian Om. All together, our family of four at last.
Once he was done nursing, Jennifer and her team took him to clean, weigh and dress him. I hear Jennifer calmly proclaim, “He weighs 10 lbs., 13 oz.”. “WHAT!?”, I responded. She repeated herself, and I couldn’t believe my ears. He was 22″ long, his head was over 15 inches and his chest was over 16(!!), which was why his body didn’t just sliiiiide right out. I was so amazed and happy that I had birthed that much baby without a single perineal tear. Jennifer shared that he was the biggest baby she had ever caught or even attended. She returned him to my arms quickly, so we weren’t apart for long, and it was sail away to baby bliss for me.
Here’s a little view of our precious gift, Arian Om Bray (pronounced Ah-ree-an) After just 10.5 hours, starting at 1am, Monday the 22nd, by the light of the New Black Moon, and with only 30 minutes of pushing, he emerged to grace the sacred Earth, weighing a whopping 10 lbs., 13 oz., 22 inches long, 15″ head, and over 16″ chest!
AND without a single intervention other than a quick head check and catch at the end…and a great deal of love, support, woo-ing, back rubbing, kissing, encouragement and cosmic vibes from my a-ma-zing husband. My only medicine was love and song…toning deep and primal through each of the many rushes. What an absolute blesSing, every single moment. I am so grateful for my own strength and for the commUNITY of love around me.
Since I opened up like a lotus, without a single tear, I am healing beautifully, and fully enjoying every single glance at our beautiful Arian. Boy is he hungry, too! I am one busy Mama, nursing him on demand, around the clock. What an absolute pleasure!
my precious children, like trees may you grow
gracing the heavenly skies
rooted deeply in our Divine Mother
gently swayed, unshaken by the currents of life
may I sit at your feet
basking in thy wisdom eternal
singing songs of our love
as one, evermore
~ Jess Bray ♥ ∞
25 weeks ~ This journey of sacred partnership between Mother and Child is one of the most beautiful gifts this life in form offers. The growth my Spirit calls for, this one carries. The experience this Soul calls for, I carry. I am never truly alone and feel mutual support all-ways. We sing together in delightful and magnified co-creation enveloped in love eternal.
Countless blossoms of beauty and emergence have come to fruition during these 40 days of daily spontaneous vocal offerings. I am grateful for every Soul who sings themselves and the world awake. May we all remember the power of heart and soul singing in our every day lives.
Join us during this year’s Compassion Games International, for “HeartSong Collective ~ Sing, Service and Potluck” for Hollow House at Rabbit Hole Hollow! Cindy Moonrose and Martin Holsinger do so much for our community. Here’s our chance to give back in their time of need.
Cindy and Martin’s Story…
About 18 months ago, fire told Cindy and Martin it was time for a new house, one more suited to the unique qualities of the site in terms of yearly solar patterns – a house that is both private and can accommodate events and workshops – a house for middle aged Cindy and Martin to grow old in and be able to share their knowledge and skill with others for as many years as possible.
As Cindy turned her attention to the 2nd blaze of the night, the 3rd arrival of fire trucks in as many days, she received the message that this fire, this “housecleaning”, is benevolent and is on the way to the fulfillment of dreams. Having been denied fire insurance years before, Cindy and Martin would learn so much about community, and community members would learn in association with the fund-raisers, work parties and workman camaraderie.
Developing skill in navigating what life brings has been a passion of Cindy and Martin for decades. Recovering from the house fire, designing a house and acting as contractor – returning to the present moment and trust repeatedly, believing in their ability to follow the cues for what actions to take next in gathering information, in raising funds, etc. – figuring out how to live without a house in a camping situation, getting through summer’s heat and winter’s cold has been a huge adventure!
WHEN? Saturday, September 13th, 1pm – 6pm
1 – 3:30 Compassionate Service Party…Singing while we work!
3:30 – 5 Introductions and Singing the vision
5 – 6 Picnic supper/potluck*
*Bring eating equipment (plate/bowl, utensils, napkins, cup, etc…) and something to sit on, food for yourself/ food to share.
WHERE? * Rabbit Hole Hollow
5155 Drakes Branch Road Nashville, TN 37218
Cindy MoonRose and Martin Holsinger
615-876-2635 or cell 615-310-2904
*Due to limited parking, CARPOOL is RECOMMENDED.
Directions: Be sure your device takes you by the intersection of Kings Lane and Drakes Branch Road.
We are up a gravel road almost at the dead end of Drakes Branch Road.
Look for the row of mailboxes on a stand on your left near the end of the blacktop.
Turn left on gravel road just beyond mailbox stand. Take left fork up a hill. You will see house draped with blue tarp. Be careful to park in a way that doesn’t block other cars.
This is a construction site, so it is muddy and it cools off in the evenings and is cooler than in town.
INTENTION? Various ceremonies have already been performed in connection with the fire, demolition and envisioning. Now it is time for this structure to appear in the physical plane! You are invited to stir the elements, nourish this form with sound. May we experience another aspect of who we are as we sing for this structure: Hollow House at Rabbit Hole Hollow. Let us sing in ease for materials and labor, the attraction of harmonious skilled helpers, safety, a good time building and creating, and a good winter of hand-making/refurbishing parties in the house making light fixtures, cabinets and more. Let’s envision a center for much growth in consciousness and knowing ourselves as part of Nature.
Visit gofundme to offer a financial contribution to the Recovery & Rebuilding of Hollow House at Rabbit Hole Hollow. Let’s help Cindy and Martin reach their financial goal to make their home and community learning center vision a reality!
The song of my precious unborn began coming through me more fully yesterday morning as I awoke. As I sang the melody, I felt its significance and silently asked, “Is it you?” My confirmation was the little dance I felt inside my womb.
This Soul song connection happened intuitively during the pregnancy with my first child, and it was some time later when I discovered the tradition of the Himba tribe of Africa (most reported, but is a tradition in some other tribal cultures as well)…each child having their own unique song, discovered and taught to the village by the Mother, so that in times of celebration or dis-ease, the community could sing that Soul’s song, helping them remember their true vibration.
Whether he is not feeling well, or I am helping him ease back into the world from slumber, I have seen the way my son lights up each time I sing “his song”. I feel a great calling to help not only keep this tradition alive but thriving. What a beautiful way to deeply connect with our children, heart and Soul, and what a wonderful way to embrace true connection and support within our communities, throughout our lives.
EXPECTING PARENTS ~ Whether you wish to conceive or are already along in your pregnancy, I would love to help you connect with your own innate ability to discover and sing your child’s Soul song. It would be my honor to assist you privately or by attending and sharing Soul song ceremony at your Blessing Way.
PREGNANCY AND BIRTHING PROFESSIONALS ~ I now offer a group experience for expectant parents, “Awaken Your Sacred Voice ~ Pregnancy, Birthing and Beyond”. Together, in a safe and sacred space, we honor each other and the journey of parenthood…from discovering your child’s Soul song to the use of singing and sounding to assist in birthing and beyond.
“You may not have grown up in an African tribe that sings your song to you at crucial life transitions, but life is always reminding you when you are in tune with yourself and when you are not. When you feel good, what you are doing matches your song, and when you feel awful, it doesn’t. In the end, we shall all recognize our song and sing it well. You may feel a little warbly at the moment, but so have all the great singers. Just keep singing and you’ll find your way home.”
(many sources ~ origin of quote unknown)
Day 10 ~ On our sunset drive to market, I sang a song of self-love…so grateful for my life.
Day 11 ~ While enjoying some early morning sharing @ my Mom’s, I felt my late Grandmother’s (Mamo’s) presence. She has always been an inspiration to me and is now one of my main spirit guides. I sang a song of love and thanks to her and all the ancestors.
Day 12 ~ Sang li’l Abner up this morning with “his” song and an extra spontaneous melody of love. Nothing like his smile!
My spontaneous vocal offerings for the 2nd annual “Sing Myself AWAKE” for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau…
Day 8 ~ I sang a song of love and gratitude to a beautiful Grandmother tree while my son was playing at the park. Everywhere we walked, there were feathers. We offered thanks for nature’s gifts and brought a few home for our altars.
Day 9 ~ I sang an infusion of love and joy into the bowl of cereal I made my son. My reward: a smile, a long hug and an I love you…priceless!
To sing we must breathe fully. Deep, full breaths cleanse and refresh the entire central channel and energetic field. Singing with a vision and intention creates a whole new world within and without. Even if it’s just a hum, sing, sing each day to your wellness, to your fullness, to create the life you desire.
My spontaneous vocal offerings for Sing Myself AWAKE with Miranda Rondeau…
Day 6 ~ I shared a spontaneous song with my son. Intention: FUN! It was in a flash moment, so no video was captured.
Day 7 ~ After playing with new laptop video methods today (none of which worked out), I got out my trusty camera and created a vocal offering for the joy of manifestation for all beings…inspired by this 40 day journey.
My spontaneous vocal offering for the 2nd annual “Sing Myself AWAKE” for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau…
I am a bit low-tech, without a smart phone to easily take video johnny on the spot, and making one with my camera is a bit of a production, but since this began, I have found myself with more and more spontaneous opportunities to share vocal offerings. The more I sing, the more beauty manifests in my life.
Yesterday, for DAY 5, I sang a song of peace (as invited) and gratitude (since I was singing in the space I am soon to begin my offerings). Blessings abound, and I know “Sing Myself Awake for 40 days” has been a huge catalyst. Infinite thanks and returns to you, Miranda!
And we all have music makers built in…our very own voices! Set an intention, visualize, imagine and feel its existence and sing it out. Your vibrational offering will not only shift your reality, but it will benefit the whole world. There are no limits here. If you can dream it, you can create it. What will you manifest?
My spontaneous vocal offerings for the 2nd annual “Sing Myself AWAKE” for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau…
Day 3 ~ was busy and beautiful. A recording didn’t happen, but as I washed and massaged my dancing feet in the final hour of the day, I connected with Source and sang a sweet melody as the water drained away on its journey.
Day 4 ~ Once again, not captured on video, but I got the most amazing gift today after some SUP (stand up paddle board) fun…to sing and drum over three amazing women. Intentions (set by them) ~ love, meta (kindness, compassion) and courage. We each hugged afterward and after the final offering, I was given a beautiful message of encouragement, we both cried and a group hug commenced. AND I was offered a space to do my practice. What a magnificent day! I am even more on fire with passion for my path of service.
Singing to center. Invigorated by my own organic sound. HeartSong expression. Overtone harmonics. Giving and receiving unite. Tuning the ONE heart. Sharing soul~full vocal vibes. Organic, conscious, melodic creation, affecting the infinite field. Awakening sacred voices and inner wisdom. That’s what makes my #SoulShine
Has a life, has a spirit, has a name
But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger
You’ll learn things you never knew you never knew
Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon
Or asked the grinning bobcat why he grinned?
Can you sing with all the voices of the mountains?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest
Come taste the sunsweet berries of the Earth
Come roll in all the riches all around you
And for once, never wonder what they’re worth
The rainstorm and the river are my brothers
The heron and the otter are my friends
And we are all connected to each other
In a circle, in a hoop that never ends
For whether we are white or copper skinned
We need to sing with all the voices of the mountains
We need to paint with all the colors of the wind
~ excerpts from Colors of the Wind
(by lyricist Stephen Schwartz for Disney’s film Pocahontas)