Becoming Mother ~ Claiming your Wild

JessiCat
JessiCat by Jess Bray

Right after I created the image above, a dear Soul Sister¬†from Nashville just called to tell me she is expecting her first sweet babe. Aaaaaaah, I am so giddy with joy for them!!!! ūüėÜ

I also discovered something while sharing with her. I really, no REALLY love supporting expecting mothers. The journey of motherhood is inclusively¬†transforming…no stone goes unturned within and without. We become¬†womben. We touch that primal part of ourselves that once lay dormant. All at once, we seed the earth and ignite the stars. ¬†Oneness with all of existence¬†becomes crystal clear. We don’t just give birth to our babes. We give birth to ourselves. The me in this photo would not have been claimed without the¬†sacred birth of my two starseeds.

For the complete home birth story of our Arian Om…Arian Om’s Journey Earthside.

~ Jess ‚ô™ ‚ô• ‚ąě

Arian Om’s Journey Earthside ~ Our Home Birth Story

 

photo by Carissa Gay
photo by Carissa Gay

PLEASE¬†BE ADVISED…¬†This is the whole, raw, complete, beautiful, sacred truth of our birth story. ¬†No details spared!¬†

It was 1am, Monday, December 22, 2014, on the Black New Moon of Winter Solstice.  I awoke with a cramping sensation.  I might be in labor, I thought, so I took note of the time and fell back to sleep.  About 8 minutes later, I awoke again with the same cramping sensation.  Not wanting to wake my husband, Jon, until I knew for sure, and knowing that he would need his rest to support me, I continued to rest in between rushes, keeping track of their distance apart.

Around 3am, the rushes were about 4-6 minutes apart and getting stronger, and I was having to breathe more deeply through them. ¬†Needing no further convincing, I awoke Jon, letting him know that I was in labor. ¬†I explained that I should eat something to build my strength, so he went to the kitchen to bring me some soup. ¬†While he was away, I suddenly had a craving for one of my son’s organic, whole food bear vitamins, so I called for him to bring two of them, too.

This was my second birth, and I was amazed at the deep, calm wisdom within that I felt guiding me.  I welcomed the experience, knowing that every rush would bring my baby to me.  I trusted my body and felt fully capable of bringing our child into the world.  With my amazing, supportive, deeply loving husband by my side, I could do anything.

After gaining nourishment, I went to the bathroom while Jon prepared our bed.  As I passed by the mirror, I realized I was wearing the shirt my Mom gave me just a few days prior.  On the front was a huge open lotus flower.  How perfect!  I sat on the toilet to pee and saw that my mucus plug was making its way out.  I began singing that just like a lotus flower, I, too, would ooooOpen wiiiiiide.

I walked around a bit, and by 4am, my rushes were a couple minutes apart and around 40 seconds long. ¬†I texted my midwife, Jennifer Vines, to let her know that I was in labor and inform her on the status of my rushes. ¬†She asked if I would like to have doula support or contact her as things progressed. ¬†I chose the latter. ¬†At this point, I was feeling very tired, so I asked Jon to lie down with me to see if I could rest between rushes. ¬†We spooned and he rubbed my back. ¬†I could feel him sharing loving, peaceful energy with me. ¬†So soothing… ¬†Amazingly, as if my body heard my call, my rushes spread back to 6 minutes apart for a little while, so I was able to sleep between them.

Two hours later, at 6am, my rushes got closer and intensified. ¬†I sat up recharged and ready to give birth to our baby. ¬†We called my Mom to get her up to speed, telling her she could contact my Blessing Way circle of Sisters around 7am to light their candles and send good energies…and that she should arrive around 8 to be there¬†when our 5 year old son, Abner, was waking so she could help dress him and take him to her house just down the street. ¬†She expressed that she kept feeling that the baby would come around 11am. ¬†I then had Jon call the midwife to give her an update on my progress. ¬†She said she would begin gathering her things and her team (her daughter, Carissa, and Sandee) and head our way in a bit.

The toilet, being a place of opening and releasing, felt like a good place for me, so I decided to hang out there.  All the while, Jon was right by my side supporting me, rubbing my back, thanking me and telling me how beautiful I was and how wonderful I was doing.  With each rush, I would tone low, primal sounds while visualizing myself opening up like a lotus.  The sounds washed through me, helping me open and relieving my discomfort.  In hindsight, I imagine these sound vibrations also comforted our baby from within.

(Click here to hear my Primal Birth Sounding.)

My bum began to get tired of the toilet seat, so I asked Jon to prepare a bath. ¬†He helped me up from the toilet, and we danced as he assisted me into the tub. ¬†Ahhhhhh, how wonderful the water felt. ¬†I called upon its wisdom, the support of my ancestors who gave birth before me, Source and my highest guides. ¬†The sun was rising, casting the most beautiful golden hue on the woods outside my bathtub’s picture window. ¬†I felt so much love from the sacred cedars and all the nature spirits, expressing my gratitude for them. ¬†I visualized my central channel cleared and charged with pure Source energy. ¬†I could feel it pouring in through my crown and emanating throughout my being.

Still in the bath, at 8am, my Mom arrived just as our son was waking.  The midwife and her team arrived at 8:30 and finished prepping our bedroom.  Sandee was diligently providing doula support and giving me water to drink between each rush.  My Mom and Abner came to tell us goodbye, and they left for her house.

photo by Carissa Gay
photo by Carissa Gay

Feeling my rushes beginning to become stagnant, my intuition guided me to get out of the bath and back on the loo.  Once there, my midwife, Jennifer knotted up a sarong to create a little tug of war for Jon and I.  I began pulling on it during rushes, and after a couple went by, I suddenly heard and felt a POP, followed by waters rushing out.  I then vomited, but only once.  After that, my rushes reached a whole new level of intensity, like crashing waves on a stormy day, coming strong and fast.  I knew then I was in transition.

Uncomfortable with the hard toilet seat at this phase, Jon assisted me to a seated position on the Gaiam ball that my intuition guided me to borrow from my Mom weeks prior. ¬†My chest was supported with pillows on our bed in front of me. ¬†It was then that I felt the urge to begin pushing, and with each rush I would circle my hips atop the ball, noticing that certain positions would bring forth more waters. ¬†I was a mammal, a powerful tigress, sounding deep and guttural. ¬†My team assured me that I was very close and doing great. ¬†Though I wanted to believe them, a part of me felt they were just saying that to make me feel better, since I pushed 3 hours with my first. ¬†I realized that doubt wasn’t helping, so I shifted back to trusting and knowing it was true, that our baby would soon be born.

In no time it seemed, I began feeling down pressure sitting on the ball, and decided to get up. ¬†My team guided me on all fours, placed the ball in front of me and draped¬†a towel over it for me to grip. ¬†As my legs were tired, I sat back on my feet in a modified squat position and kept pushing with the rushes. ¬†Oooooooooooommmm…Ooooooooooommmmm… more sounding, more opening.

All the sudden I found myself concerned over not having paid my midwife in full, yet. ¬†I knew from reading the birthing stories in Ina May’s midwifery books that once women voiced their toils, the baby came right out. ¬†She sensed my thinking, and asked me about it, just as I was beginning to share that there was something I needed to express. ¬†Once I did, and she very kindly assured me that she was not worried about it, that it was okay, and that right now, I just needed to have this baby, I got back to the task at hand.

Just as the stories told, within 5 minutes, I felt a strong burning sensation. ¬†It was like I was giving birth through my bum hole. ¬†(People don’t talk about this much, but it’s true!) ¬†Jennifer checked me, and she said she felt the baby’s head. ¬†After a couple more pushes, she directed me to raise my bum up off my feet a bit and shared, “We’ve got the head!” ¬†On one hand I was so excited to hear his head was out, but on the other hand I was like, “Then what is the hang up?!”, because with my first, once the head was out, the rest of him just slid on out. ¬†I felt a gentle tug and immediate relief…our baby was born at 11:34am!!! ¬†Since I was facing the other direction, I turned my head and saw our precious BOY!!! ¬†Surprise, it’s a boy!!! ¬†I watched as they cleared his airways and he turned pink. ¬†The song of his cries was music to my ears.

Jon helped me to the bed, and they placed our precious baby in my arms.  Infinite loooove!  We went right to work on getting latched and breastfeeding.  It took him a little while, but he tried diligently and got the hang of it, finally latching and drinking in my sacred, natural nourishment.  The placenta was born and Jon cut the cord once it was done pumping.  Abner and Mom arrived at the house to check on us, only to find that the baby had been born.  They came in and greeted our new family member, Arian Om.  All together, our family of four at last.

photo by Carissa Gay
photo by Carissa Gay
jess29
photo by Carissa Gay

Once he was done nursing, Jennifer and her team took him to clean, weigh and dress him. ¬†I hear Jennifer calmly proclaim, “He weighs 10 lbs., 13 oz.”. ¬†“WHAT!?”, I responded. ¬†She repeated herself, and I couldn’t believe my ears. ¬†He was 22″ long, his head was over 15 inches and his chest was over 16(!!), which was why his body didn’t just sliiiiide right out. ¬†I was so amazed and happy that I had birthed that much baby without a single perineal tear. ¬†Jennifer shared that he was the biggest baby she had ever caught or even attended. ¬†She returned him to my arms quickly, so we weren’t apart for long, and it was sail away to baby bliss for me.

Welcome Earthside, Arian Om Bray!

BrayFamily12.25.14_edited MommyKisses

Here’s a little view of our precious gift, Arian Om Bray (pronounced Ah-ree-an) After just 10.5 hours, starting at 1am, Monday the 22nd, by the light of the New Black Moon, and with only 30 minutes of pushing, he emerged to grace the sacred Earth, weighing a whopping 10 lbs., 13 oz., 22 inches long, 15″ head, and over 16″ chest!

AND without a single intervention other than a quick head check and catch at the end…and a great deal of love, support, woo-ing, back rubbing, kissing, encouragement and cosmic vibes from my a-ma-zing husband. My only medicine was love and song…toning deep and primal through each of the many rushes. What an absolute blesSing, every single moment. I am so grateful for my own strength and for the commUNITY of love around me.

Since I opened up like a lotus, without a single tear, I am healing beautifully, and fully enjoying every single glance at our beautiful Arian. Boy is he hungry, too! I am one busy Mama, nursing him on demand, around the clock. What an absolute pleasure!

Thanks so much to my wonderful midwife team, Vines Midwifery Service!

Love Infinite~

Om,
Jess

My children…

nesttree

my precious children, like trees may you grow
gracing the heavenly skies
rooted deeply in our Divine Mother
gently swayed, unshaken by the currents of life
may I sit at your feet
basking in thy wisdom eternal
singing songs of our love
as one, evermore
~ Jess Bray¬†‚ô•¬†‚ąě

Answering the call of the sea ~ Returning October 10th

KateChopin_The-voice-of-the-sea-speaks-to-the-soul_FenjaSepers_NavigateOnTrust

The voice of the sea is singing to me. She beckons my Soul, and I answer the call. The time has come to surrender, swept in the expansiveness of her wisdom and emerge a new tide to shore ~ I in her and she in me, forevermore. ~ JB

I am officially unplugged for my journey to sea till October 10th.

Visit me, right after I return, at the First Annual Southeast Nashville Festival¬†for Music and Arts, October 11th, 10am – 4pm, inside the Global Mall in Antioch, TN, for a Soul-quenching personal ManifeStation Sound Journey by donation. I can’t wait to open my Heart and Soul in service to my community in this way!

Deep Peace, Infinite Love and Bliss-full Joy to All!

~ Jess¬†‚ô•¬†‚ąě

His Voice Melts Me

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Last night my son requested I sing him to sleep. I asked if he would like me to sing anything in particular. He said, “my special song”, and then proceeded to sing a bit of it for me. It was the first time I’ve heard “his song” come from his own precious voice. Words cannot describe the pure loving bliss of that experience. His singing will forever be imprinted in my memory.

~ Jess¬†‚ô•¬†‚ąě

Sunset Sonic Journey Bliss at The Hermitage

The amazing Yogi and Yoginis, fully blissed after Megan Kipp's Harvest Moon Yoga and Sonic Journey with Jess
The amazing Yogi and Yoginis, fully blissed after Megan Kipp’s Harvest Moon Yoga and Sonic Journey with Jess
sunset Sonic Journey shavasana with Jess
sunset Sonic Journey shavasana with Jess

This Muse is still beaming with the magic of last eve’s outdoor yoga and Sonic Journey at¬†The Hermitage, Home of President Andrew Jackson.¬† When I arrived there were wild turkey guiding us to our grassy space under the sunset sky. While we practiced, there were dragonfliesand birds gracefully dancing overhead, and as we left, Mother Nature gifted me with a beautiful turkey feather, sticking right up out of the ground, as if to say, thank you for sharing your gifts with the world. This journey I dance is truly incredible, and I am infinitely grateful!


~ Jess¬†‚ô• ‚ąě

Full Harvest Supermoon 2014 ~ Sing Myself AWAKE ~ Day 40

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by the light of the full harvest supermoon, my intentions are set in melodic vocal vibrations

‪#‎singmyselfAWAKE‬ ~ Day 40

Countless blossoms of beauty and emergence have come to fruition during these 40 days of daily spontaneous vocal offerings.  I am grateful for every Soul who sings themselves and the world awake.  May we all remember the power of heart and soul singing in our every day lives.

~ Jess¬†‚ô• ‚ąě

Singing during skin-to-skin contact benefits Mama and Baby

Skin-to-skin bonding ~ photo courtesy toronto.ca
Skin-to-skin bonding ~ photo courtesy toronto.ca

Inspired by my current pregnancy, one of our latest A.muse.in’ Harmony group experiences, “Awaken Your Sacred Voice ~ Pregnancy, Birthing and Beyond” helps expecting parents connect with the power of their own voice for wellness, labor support and soulful parenting. If this sings to you, connect with us today!

As a Soul singing, baby wearing Mama, I can personally attest to the power of this, but the research to back it up is fantastic to see!

Maternal singing during skin-to-skin contact benefits both preterm infants, mothers

~ Jess¬†‚ô• ‚ąě

 

 

Sound BlesSing at Art Camp Nashville

So grateful to Amanda Dobra Hope, of Golden Dolphin Healing, for her inspiring presentation at Art Camp Nashville yesterday.  I felt guided to sing into the drum with her and gift her with a sound blessing afterward.  Thank you, Amanda, for the beauty and amazing energy you bring to the world!

~ Jess Bray ‚ô•

Connect with Amanda Dobra Hope of Golden Dolphin Healing

Our own music ~

 

 

ourownmusic

Yes, and sometimes it comes out wildly, passionately and loudly. ¬†Singing is such a blissful way to connect within, express, release and create. ¬†It’s a meditation, bathed in your Soul’s vibrations.

~ Jess Bray ♥

Awaken Your Sacred Voice ~ Pregnancy, Birthing and Beyond

womb_connection

The song of my precious unborn began coming through me more fully yesterday morning as I awoke. As I sang the melody, I felt its significance and silently asked, “Is it you?” My confirmation was the little dance I felt inside my womb.

This Soul song connection happened intuitively during the pregnancy with my first child, and it was some time later when I discovered the tradition of the Himba tribe of Africa (most reported, but is a tradition in some other tribal cultures as well)…each child having their own unique song, discovered and taught to the village by the Mother, so that in times of celebration or dis-ease, the community could sing that Soul’s song, helping them remember their true vibration.

Whether he is not feeling well, or I am helping him ease back into the world from slumber, I have seen the way my son lights up each time I sing “his song”. I feel a great calling to help not only keep this tradition alive but thriving. What a beautiful way to deeply connect with our children, heart and Soul, and what a wonderful way to embrace true connection and support within our communities, throughout our lives.

~~~

EXPECTING PARENTS ~ Whether you wish to conceive or are already along in your pregnancy, I would love to help you connect with your own innate ability to discover and sing your child’s Soul song. It would be my honor to assist you privately or by attending and sharing Soul song ceremony at your Blessing Way.

PREGNANCY AND BIRTHING PROFESSIONALS ~ I now offer a group experience for expectant parents, “Awaken Your Sacred Voice ~ Pregnancy, Birthing and Beyond”. Together, in a safe and sacred space, we honor each other and the journey of parenthood…from discovering your child’s Soul song to the use of singing and sounding to assist in birthing and beyond.

If any of this resonates, connect with me today!

~ Jess ‚̧

~~~

“You may not have grown up in an African tribe that sings your song to you at crucial life transitions, but life is always reminding you when you are in tune with yourself and when you are not. When you feel good, what you are doing matches your song, and when you feel awful, it doesn’t. In the end, we shall all recognize our song and sing it well. You may feel a little warbly at the moment, but so have all the great singers. Just keep singing and you‚Äôll find your way home.”
(many sources ~ origin of quote unknown)

 

 

Research shows music reduces pain, slows heart rates and improves children’s moods

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Can singing ease a child’s pain?¬†b

Absolutely! Last night, my Mom brought my son home at 2am with difficulties breathing (major head congestion). Bless him, he was moaning and could not get a wink of sleep. After some natural remedies, which seemed to ease him a bit, he was still having troubles getting settled in bed. I began to sing “his song” to him, and within seconds, he finally drifted off…and this is just the most recent example of many.

Music transcends, as life itself is an intricately woven tapestry of vibration waves (aka…sound waves). Now 21 weeks pregnant, I can also say that even before our babes are born, they respond to music in utero. Sweet babe can be still as can be, but begin to sing, drum or play music and movement ensues, often to the beat.

I am thankful for the increasing amount of research being done to prove music and singing as a powerful tool for well being.

~ Jess¬†‚ąě ‚ô•

Sing Myself AWAKE ~ Days 10, 11 & 12

‚Ä™#‚Äésingmyselfawake‚Ĩ¬†for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau…

Day 10 ~ On our sunset drive to market, I sang a song of self-love…so grateful for my life.

Day 11 ~ While enjoying some early morning sharing @ my Mom’s, I felt my late Grandmother’s (Mamo’s) presence. She has always been an inspiration to me and is now one of my main spirit guides. I sang a song of love and thanks to her and all the ancestors.

Day 12 ~ Sang li’l Abner up this morning with “his” song and an extra spontaneous melody of love. Nothing like his smile!

Sing Myself AWAKE ~ Days 8 & 9

My spontaneous vocal offerings for the 2nd annual “Sing Myself AWAKE” for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau…

Day 8 ~ I sang a song of love and gratitude to a beautiful Grandmother tree while my son was playing at the park. Everywhere we walked, there were feathers. We offered thanks for nature’s gifts and brought a few home for our altars.

Day 9 ~ I sang an infusion of love and joy into the bowl of cereal I made my son. My reward: a smile, a long hug and an I love you…priceless!

It’s not too late! ¬†Join Sing Myself AWAKE on Facebook.¬†

~ Jess ♥

Singing for Well Being

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To sing we must breathe fully. Deep, full breaths cleanse and refresh the entire central channel and energetic field. Singing with a vision and intention creates a whole new world within and without. Even if it’s just a hum, sing, sing each day to your wellness, to your fullness, to create the life you desire.

~ Jess ♥

Sing Myself AWAKE ~ Days 6 and 7

My spontaneous vocal offerings for Sing Myself AWAKE with Miranda Rondeau…

Day 6 ~ I shared a spontaneous song with my son. Intention: FUN! It was in a flash moment, so no video was captured.

Day 7 ~ After playing with new laptop video methods today (none of which worked out), I got out my trusty camera and created a vocal offering for the joy of manifestation for all beings…inspired by this 40 day journey.

~ Jess ♥

It’s not too late to join and invite your friends to Sing Myself AWAKE!
https://www.facebook.com/events/342425689240540/?fref=ts

 

Sing Myself AWAKE ~ Day 5

My spontaneous vocal offering for the 2nd annual ‚ÄúSing Myself AWAKE‚ÄĚ for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau‚Ķ

I am a bit low-tech, without a smart phone to easily take video johnny on the spot, and making one with my camera is a bit of a production, but since this began, I have found myself with more and more spontaneous opportunities to share vocal offerings. The more I sing, the more beauty manifests in my life.

Yesterday, for DAY 5, I sang a song of peace (as invited) and gratitude (since I was singing in the space I am soon to begin my offerings). Blessings abound, and I know “Sing Myself Awake for 40 days” has been a huge catalyst. Infinite thanks and returns to you, Miranda!

~ Jess ♥

It’s not too late! ¬†Join Sing Myself AWAKE on Facebook @
https://www.facebook.com/events/342425689240540/

 

The Power of Music

music_creates

And we all have music makers built in…our very own voices! Set an intention, visualize, imagine and feel its existence and sing it out. Your vibrational offering will not only shift your reality, but it will benefit the whole world. There are no limits here. If you can dream it, you can create it. What will you manifest?

~ Jess ♥